We all have personal goals we want to accomplish – things like cleaning out the garage, reading more books, walking the dog regularly, and so on. But despite our best intentions, these goals often get pushed aside while we focus on work and other responsibilities. Before long, we’re left feeling frustrated and disappointed in our lack of progress.
I’ve noticed that I am often much harder on myself when it comes to making progress on personal goals versus work projects. This is likely because of the strong emotions tied to personal aspirations – if you fail at something you want for your own life, it can lead to feelings of shame and being a failure. With work tasks, you can be a bit more dispassionate, and the job priorities can seem more pressing in the moment since you’re being paid for them. This can cause us to delay personal goals and over-focus on career, only to later feel regret and self-criticism.
One reason work and career goals can overshadow personal objectives is that professional achievements often provide more immediate feedback and rewards then personal goals. Completing a big project at work earns kudos from your boss and colleagues. But no one cheers when you get a full night’s sleep or clean out your garage. This can skew priorities towards work accomplishments. However, deprioritizing personal goals has negative long-term effects. Earlier in my career, I developed a bad habit of staying up late to get ahead on work. This seemed beneficial short-term as I was viewed as highly productive and given more responsibilities. But lack of sleep caught up and made me less effective over time.
To combat this tendency, I think about the short-term benefits of my long-term personal goals. I notice how having a full night’s rest helps me get more done the next day. Taking quiet time before starting work leaves me less anxious. By linking daily habits to immediate positives, it’s easier to prioritize personal well-being. A project manager thinks long-term, recognizing that quick career wins can undermine health and fulfillment if you ignore personal needs. With the right systems, you can find small rewards that reinforce sustainable habits.
By taking a project management approach to personal goals, we can remove some of the charged emotion and view objectives more logically. Instead of getting caught up in anxiety around progress, step back and break each goal down into smaller, actionable sub-tasks. I stopped thinking “I need to clean out the entire garage!” and instead focused on “Today I will spend one hour sorting through boxes.” This allowed me to develop a plan and timeline in a calm, rational way.
The first step is to identify 2-3 key goals to focus on. It’s easy to have a huge list of things we want to accomplish, but trying to tackle too many goals at once will only lead to frustration. I prioritize and decide what objectives were most important to me right now. Some aspirations, like learning a new language, ended up on the back burner.
With my top goals identified, I break each one down into smaller, manageable tasks. In project management for work, we would create a backlog and work in sprints, but that level of rigor isn’t necessary for personal goals. Instead, I pick the next logical task for each goal and add it to my task list with a deadline.
A key concept here is managing your work in progress (WIP). For personal projects, I’ve found it’s best to limit yourself to 2-3 active tasks at a time. Trying to juggle too many personal to-dos causes stress and ensures you won’t complete any of them. On weekends or days with more free time, you may be able to take on a few more tasks. But in general, focus on a handful of priority items and resist overloading your plate.
You also need to tailor your approach based on the type of goal:
For goals with a defined endpoint, like assembling furniture or painting a room, you can break the project down into specific milestones and target dates. The steps are clear – purchase supplies, move or cover the furniture, prep the area, paint the room. The project management techniques help you organize and schedule the required tasks.
For perpetual goals like eating more protein, you’ll need to think longer-term. This type of goal requires changing habits and building new routines over time. Rather than defined milestones, focus on small changes you can implement and stick to every day. For example, having Greek yogurt instead of cereal for breakfast or adding a side salad with lunch. View it as an ongoing effort, continually looking for small improvements. Celebrate when a new habit sticks.
Another concept that I borrow from project management for personal projects is the retrospective. In Agile at the end of a sprint or the end of a project, we do a retrospective where we look at what is going well, what to keep doing, and what to stop doing. I’ve adapted this for my personal goals by regularly reviewing how am I doing, what’s going well, what’s not going well, and what I could do differently to be more effective.
These retrospectives allow me to spot issues early and course-correct before small lapses turn into major regressions. If I notice boredom is leading me to overindulge in social media, I can brainstorm alternate activities or schedule my days differently. The key is being honest with yourself and frequently re-evaluating what’s working.
Taking a project manager approach can also help you honestly evaluate activities you’ve been doing out of habit or inertia. I’ve found I sometimes continue hobbies or habits simply because they’ve become part of my identity, even if I no longer enjoy them. By pretending I was hired to manage my own life, I can take a dispassionate look at how I spend my time and money.
I applied this technique to re-assess collecting certain items that had become a hobby. Even though I regularly spent money to add to my collection, taking a step back made me realize I got little value from it anymore. The hobby was driven by inertia rather than genuine interest. By cutting out that routine, I freed up time and money to focus on goals that mattered more to me.
When you’re trying to build lasting habits and achieve personal goals, there will inevitably be setbacks. If you find yourself beating yourself up because you’ve slipped on consistency or haven’t made progress lately, go easy on yourself. Rather than criticizing, identify the next positive step you can take to move forward again. If you feel bad that you haven’t exercised all week, don’t dwell on regret. Instead, put on your workout clothes right then and do some activity, even if it’s just a walk around the block. Progress isn’t linear – focus on the next step, not dwelling on what you “should have” done already. Your inner project manager understands that iteration and readjustment is part of the process.
Viewing your life through a project manager lens empowers you to regularly analyze activities and make logical decisions about what to continue, what to adjust, and what to stop altogether. It removes emotion from the equation so you can align your time and resources with what is most important.
Eponymous 